‘Lots of times, they’re alone:’ Ottawa ICU nurse shares story from pandemic front line

By Jason White

An Ottawa ICU nurse is giving the public a sense of what it's like to care for Ottawa's sickest COVID-19 patients and be with them in their final moments when their families cannot.

While COVID-19 has taken a heavy emotional toll on nearly everyone, there may be no greater burden in the pandemic than the one carried by staff of intensive care units, as they watch more COVID-19 patients enter their care.

“I find going into work [is] one of the most difficult things to do,” said an ICU nurse at The Ottawa Hospital's General campus, identified as Melanie in a new video by Ottawa Public Health. “You're going into work, into the unknown.”

Melanie said ICU nurses are often the only people with COVID-19 patients when they die. Any family member who visits has to isolate for 14 days afterward, and most are limited to seeing their unconscious loved one by video chat.

“If someone passes away in the ICU, before COVID, you'd hug [their family member],” said Melanie. “Or, you know, you'd be able to look at them in the eye and tell them you're sorry, but now, lots of times, they're alone.”

Without loved ones at the bedside, Melanie said one thing that's changed about her nursing is touch; something that she never thought of before the pandemic seems to now be a much more important thing.

“Something that impacts me a lot is, I don't know who that person is,” said Melanie. “So, yeah, I'm holding their hand as they pass away…but I have no idea who they were.”

“I mean, the patient who passed last night, I just knew he had a girlfriend,” she said. “I never even heard his voice.”

You can watch Melanie's full video on Ottawa Public Health's YouTube page, part of a series of COVID stories from healthcare workers and patients.

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